Rats don’t like to be seen – study determines
Announcement from D.U.H.
Rats do NOT like to be seen.
The Department of Understanding Humans, or D.U.H. sometimes does studies of popular animals that humans encounter, such as rats. In this recent study, D.U.H. announced 2 main conclusions regarding rats. First, they hate being seen. Secondly, there are a lot more of them than you think. Don’t ask; you don’t want to know how many there are.
After hearing tales of boundless rats coming from some of the major cities, D.U.H. sent teams of people with bright flashlights into some of the darkest corners of metropolitan areas. Sure enough, they discovered that upon turning on the light, thousands of rats scattered in all directions. This is how they came to the conclusions mentioned above; rats hate to be seen and there are a lot of them.
Now, an additional corollary is that if you ever see an actual rat during the daytime, it’s likely not one of the smarter ones. The old and big ones hide most of the time. The reason is because there are loads of animals and even people, who upon merely seeing a rat, set out to get rid of it by any means possible. This is why the rats decided to have a lot of children, because most of them don’t get to be very old.”
More reasons rats hide
” We also discovered that rats smell horrible. That’s another reason they hide, because their enemies have incredible noses, and they know they are not appreciated at all by anyone, at anytime, or anywhere.” ”Nobody really likes them,” said the spokesperson. “It’s a bit sad, actually.”
D.U.H. declined to answer any questions about how this relates to people, whether some people might be “rats” in disguise, or how we came to associate the word rat with disgusting.
” All we know for sure about rats, ” he said, ” is that they hate light. And one other thing. Since they live in the dark, there’s a lot of hanky panky going on, that’s why there are so many of them. We will continue our study.”
Mice: ” cute mini-rats “, fun to own and play with
He continued by saying that mice are very much like rats in some respects ( hate light, have lots of kids ). However, since mice are much smaller, some people think they’re cute and invite them in for supper.
“In fact,”, he said, “we came across quite a few amazing cases, where a family had actually adopted a mouse, or even a whole family, and prepared a special home, with tunnels, tons of food, and little nests. Utterly amazing. It just goes to show if you’re cute enough, and cuddly, anything is possible. They live quite the life, those mice. They don’t even have to hide, unless they just want to have some fun doing the other thing they are famous for.”
